Empty Nexting: What To Do With All That Stuff?

Empty Nexting: What To Do With All That Stuff?: How much stuff does one person need? I mean, really NEED. Cleaning out my old house which had already been cleared out several times, is sh...

What To Do With All That Stuff?

How much stuff does one person need? I mean, really NEED. Cleaning out my old house which had already been cleared out several times, is showing me how much unnecessary stuff I've managed to accumulate over the years. And mind you, I consider myself to be a minimalist. I don't have a lot of furniture or nicknacks, not even shoes (compared with a lot of women I know) but I do have a ton of hard copy items that nowadays are stored online. Think about it:

1. Books - I have over 200 books, hard bound with covers and spines. That means a lot of bookcases to hold the books. I also have a Nook, a laptop and an IPhone so in theory I don't really need any of those "real" books anymore. But it seems sacrileges to throw them away. All that effort on the cover design and the many trees that gave their lives for the printing of those wonderful works of magic is just a small reason it is so hard for me to part with them. Mostly it's the memories of touching the paper as I turned the pages in anticipation of the next sentence. How could anyone possibly give those up? Most of my books have been read by me over and over and the cover reminds me of the first time I ever met "Bilbo Baggins" , "Jay Gatsby", "Catherine Barkley" and so many of my other "friends".  It hurts inside at the thought of not having them near me anymore. Okay, I know that sounds crazy and it probably is a little. I could donate them to a library so other people, young people discovering them for the first time maybe, can get some of the same satisfaction from them that I've always experienced. Or not.

2. CDs and Albums - When 8 Track Tapes were replaced by CDs I didn't really feel any great loss. I liked the concept of a CD; being in the Creative field the idea of cool cover designs and fun graphical inserts has always been appealing to me. And I fully embrace online music storage. I love my ITunes, Spotify and Pandora playlists and really hardly ever even think about playing an actual CD anymore. Still, the idea of throwing them away is off putting. All that plastic! The wonderful lyric inserts, the photos of the musicians...that's hard to give up. Still, where does one store all of those square boxes? The Albums that I have kept around aren't going anywhere, no matter what! The ones I have chosen to keep are all time favorites with as many memories as my post college brain can store. Everyone form my generation knows what I mean when I say "album spines"...the things we used those for will never be replaced by online anything. So what I have to get rid of a chair or two, I'm keeping the damn albums.

3. Photographs and negatives - Can you even remember the last time you took film to get developed? Still I have boxes and boxes of hard copy photographs, most still in the envelope they came back from the store in. After all, the act of taking the photo has always been more important than what you do with the photo afterward. Well, not today I guess. Today you take the photo with your IPhone so you can tweet, Instagram, Snap Chat, Facebook, Pinterest it and share it with everyone you'd ever even want to know. I'm not judging because I do it too, I'm just sayin'...but those old vintage (1999) photos are so cool to go through every once and a while. How can I possibly part with them? Those are pictures of my kids, after all, and I wouldn't throw away memories of my kids!

4. Address books and calendars - For years I kept all of my old address books and calendars so I could remember what I had done and who I had known in the past. That just seems silly now that you can store every minute of your life on your phone and save it on Cloud. Easy one, I'll throw away the calendars and address books. Oh, but wait, some of those calendars have pictures of my kids on them, must keep those (see bullet 3).

I've hauled away to Goodwill tons of clothes, furniture, electronics, pots and pans and streamlined my household supplies to a bare minimum. You can't put any of those things online but still it wasn't hard to part with them. It's the memories that I have trouble giving away. I think what it comes down to is I don't want to share my memories with strangers. The books, photos and music are just physical representations of all of those wonderful times spent experiencing new things, learning new information, living life to its fullest. Some day I may not be able to remember these times and then the physical items won't have as much value, but until then folks when you come to visit me you can just sit on the floor (or on a stack of albums).

Speaking of downsizing, here is a great detox recipe for shedding unwanted pounds after a splurge or two too many.

Detox Diet

6 whole tomatoes

2 garlic cloves

2 cups of mixed peppers (green, yellow, red, orange)

1 bunch of broccoli

2 cups of low sodium vegetable broth

Puree al ingredients together in food processor and cook on low for about 30 minutes. Have one cup every day for 7 days for lunch.

For breakfast have 1 serving of fruit
1 cup of greek yogurt with honey for mid morning snack

For dinner have a green salad with fat free dressing and one small baked potato (I use sweet potatoes).
Raw veggies for pre dinner snack and 1 cup of 1% milk for an after dinner snack.

 I did this for 7 days and lost 10 pounds.

The Big Thaw

As we head into summer and warm weather, I am reminded of another type of "thaw" that is taking place in my life. After about a two-year numbness, I'm starting to thaw out, FEEL again. You know how the snow melts and leaves puddles everywhere? That's what I am experiencing....puddles of emotion coming at me sometimes in a huge pile like snow in a parking lot melting,  and other times more like the gentle dripping of ice hanging from a window sill.

For example, when I moved from my house in November of 2011 I did it quickly and without emotion. I just moved out and moved on. Never mind that house is where we took prom pictures, hosted graduation dinners, fed my daughter's band after practice every Sunday. Forget the fact that every bonus check for seven years went into that house; the sun room, the patio, the driveway... Those memories were carefully put aside so I could continue living. Now that the house is nearing sale, those memories are rushing back in a big storm of emotion that has left me feeling, well, FEELING, for the first time in a long while. Sitting on the floor of my oldest daughter's former bedroom and trying to decide which books, pictures, trophies and report cards to keep and what to toss, it became very clear to me that my emotional puddles were forming. The walk down memory lane opened up a lot of wounds and reminded me of much happiness and fun times as well. For that hour I had more ups and downs than a bipolar jack rabbit and it wiped me out.

Another strange thing happened today. It dawned on me that my daughters are never moving back "home". They are living and thriving in their own lives, their own cities, and I couldn't be more proud. One is about to launch a tour with her band and the other is filming a TV series. I'd say they have formed pretty solid roots. But I think a piece of me, the numb piece, expected that it was a temporary state. Drip, drip...it's permanent people. I'm actually considering down sizing from my already down-sized townhouse to a two bedroom. It's just me now and stuff just got real.

I actually think this thaw is a great thing, a very good sign. I mean we all need to deal with our emotions and work through issues rather than keep them inside. And along with the sad feelings are coming some other feelings that I haven't had in quite a while - that tingling excitement inside when you get a text or message or phone call from that certain someone of interest....pleasant but also frightening...isn't that what got me into this situation to begin with?

And as I am shedding baggage I'm also dropping pounds. It's almost like my body is preparing for the big thaw as well - it doesn't need the extra weight to protect from the cold anymore. I have dropped two sizes in the past month and I'm actually looking forward to my work outs and no longer having intense cravings for carbs and red meat - but I have to be honest with you - when I smell my neighbors grilling out big juicy burgers all bets are off. And cold Samuel Smith Oatmeal Stout still calls my name. Everything in moderation, right? That includes emotions. I'm using my mental dial to keep the flow at a thin stream rather than a full on flood. Bring on the 100 degrees universe, I'm ready!

And speaking of hot, here is a light twist on the summer grill out. The Raspberry, Citrus salad dressing is a recipe from a chef friend of mine and it is not only healthy but also delicious. And the Dark Chocolate Sorbet will melt your heart. Enjoy!

Vegetable Turkey Burger

• 3/4 pound ground turkey
• 1 medium zucchini, grated
• 1 medium carrot, grated
• 2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
• 3/4 teaspoon dried thyme
• 3/4 teaspoon kosher salt
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
• 1 large egg
• 3 tablespoons olive oil
• 4 slices crusty bread
• 4 small leaves Boston lettuce
• 4 tablespoons mayonnaise (optional)
• 2 teaspoons fresh lemon juice (optional)
• 
  
• Directions

1. Heat broiler. In a large bowl, combine the turkey, zucchini, carrot, garlic, thyme, salt, pepper, and egg. Form the mixture into 4 patties.
2. Heat 1 tablespoon of the oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Cook the patties, turning once, until no pink remains, 4 to 5 minutes per side.
3. Meanwhile, place the bread on a baking sheet and brush with the remaining oil. Broil until golden brown and crisp, about 1 ½ minutes.
4. Transfer the bread to individual plates. Top with the lettuce and burgers. If desired, combine the mayonnaise and lemon juice and serve with the burgers.

Feta Beet Salad

Mixed greens (1 bag for four people)
4 whole beets (I use the packaged beets from Trader Joe's) sliced
1/4 cup of pine nuts split 4 ways
1/4 cup of feta cheese split 4 ways
1/4 cup of red pepper chopped and split 4 ways

Dressing
1/4 cup of fresh organic raspberries
1/4 cup of fresh orange juice squeezed from 1 large orange
1 tablespoon of Blue Agave
1/2 cup of Balsamic vinegar
1/2 cup of water
Fresh ground pepper to taste

Mix together and store in refrigerator over night

Dark Chocolate Raspberry Sorbet

3 cups of water
1 1/2 cups of granulated sugar
1 2/3 cups of dark cocoa
1/4 cup of raspberries pureed
1 teaspoon of salt
1 teaspoon of pure vanilla extract

Make a simple syrup with the water, sugar and salt in a sauce pan until the sugar is completely  dissolved. Add raspberry puree and cocoa and whisk until smooth. Store covered in frig for at least 2 hours.

Put in an ice cream maker and blend for 20 minutes. You can top with some shaved chocolate pieces if desired.